There are multiple layers to this book — it drew me in on so many levels. The author uses her own history to ask questions about love, relationships, monogamy and hidden desires. She bravely questions — why is monogamy seen as the most acceptable way to conduct a relationship, and what would happen if we make different choices? Would everything fall apart?
Essentially, this is a book about ambiguity. People explore, discover, fumble and make mistakes through their choices. Kofman interviewed people from all walks of life, sexual orientations and relationship configurations in an attempt to make sense of these questions. She is open about her own confusion in trying to understand these issues in the context of her own life.
Drawing from artists throughout history such as Anais Nin and Iris Murdoch, she shows that these complexities are not new. By examining the life stories of these people, another question is posed — is layered and non-monogamous sexuality more common among artists? I enjoyed the way the author created a labyrinth of questions without judgment. It is primarily an exploration rather than a manifesto. Raw, brilliantly researched and intelligent, I highly recommend this book.